Love is a Choice

A young person asked me recently what is was like to adopt a child, “is it different?” That question got me to thinking just how similar adoption is to marriage. One day I didn’t know my husband, the next I did. A unique encounter that set us on this path of connection.

We don’t have the same parents (thank God because that would be really awkward). I don’t remember his birth or Toddler stage. I don’t know how much he weighed as a newborn. I don’t share his DNA, and yet he is the single most important person on this planet to me. He is a part of me.

Adoption is A similar thing. Family doesn’t depend on our DNA connection. Being a mother doesn’t solely mean I delivered you. Adoption, marriage, parenthood set us up to choose one another everyday. A choice to love you even when others are baffled by how much.

As my heart was processing through this, my little daughter was getting ready for daycare. She needed a jacket and I noticed I hadn’t had time to write her name in it. If you know our family, you know we all exchange clothes, and because of that I didn’t want to write her first name. So I wrote Backues. Then I cried.

She just started daycare and I hadn’t had the opportunity to write Backues on anything for her before. It reminded me of my wedding and seeing Backues following Serena, the joy I got in it being mine. It was Just a simple moment to remind me of something bigger.

Love is a choice. Everyday.