My attention was brought to recent statistics on the impact of promiscuity on teenagers in the United kingdom. It would not be a surprise if this statistic exists in other nations. I was heartbroken for children affected. They really do not know what they are doing. I believe promiscuity, fornication, and every sexual sin are rooted in the desire to fill a void only God’s love can fill.
Some Christian parents do not discuss sex with their children. When some do, sex is described as dirty and sinful. Unfortunately, some parents are on the extreme end of the spectrum, they tell their children it is okay to have sex with anyone, anything, anytime, and anywhere. These approaches are dysfunctional, Biblically. I have purposed in my heart that the little one will hear about sex from his parents first and he will be taught the truth about sex from a Biblical perspective.
These are 6 things I believe our children need to know about sex:
Sex is not dirty and God created us with a natural desire for sex.
The desire for sex can be controlled just like the desire for food.
Sex is not only physical, it is spiritual.
People should not be objectified to satisfy one’s sexual desire.
Porn is not okay. Many people get hurt.
God does not want His children to have sex outside marriage.
It is up to us to let our children know these things. Our governments cannot do it for us.
Some people believe they are missing out when they do not have sex with several people before getting married. That is a lie. What they do not think about is the fact that they save themselves from having memories they do not like and the burden of soul ties. All of which only Jesus can set one free from. These days, people think they can go against God’s Word and nature without consequences. That is a lie. It is a great deception. If the Bible says it is wrong, it is wrong. It does not matter what we feel or think about sex. God’s Word is the final authority for those who love God. If we love God, we will do what pleases him. Not what pleases our flesh.
Hebrews 13:4 (MSG)
Honor marriage, and guard the sacredness of sexual intimacy between wife and husband. God draws a firm line against casual and illicit sex.
What else should our children know about sex?
PS-Here are articles that can help you with parent-child sex conversation:
5 Guidelines on Parenting Your Kids On Sexuality
How do you talk to your preteen about sex?
Talking to Your Kids About Sex- When and How
My Eight-Year-Old and Pornography
I recommend this blog for all parents: THERE ARE A LOT OF PLACES YOUR CHILD CAN HEAR ABOUT SEX. WE THINK THE BEST PLACE IS FROM YOU.
That sex is between two “mature” heterosexual adults that are married to one another. Also, children need to know that sex is expensive in hospitals bills and the results of a treatment of an STD, pregnancy and raising a child adequately (food, housing, clothes, extra curriculum activities, etc.).
Thank you for the additions. I chuckled when I read “sex is expensive”. That’s a fact.
lol, yes ma’am!
I LOVE this, Temi. I never got “the talk” as a child. My mom always said, “you can ask whenever you have questions.” And I never took her up on that as a teenager 😂.
There are things I wish I had learned, and things my peers knew, that I never found out until college. Since then, my husband and I have resolved to not just have A talk with our kids, but many little ones. And your list is a wealth of necessary and helpful ideas👌.
Yeah! haaaha! I have added more resources you will find helpful. I am reading and writing to prepare myself. Thank you for reflecting with me.
I am 100% in agreement with you. It should that becoming a parent understand our God given responsibilities. Society is marred with facts that are not Biblical therefore Parents need to get in the Word of God and begin to teach their children about sex. God will hold all parent accountable in the way they train up their children. Very important post Temi
Thank you for the reflective comment. The society’s views on sex is selfish and harmful. We must not let the society shape our children’s views on sex.
You are right it is the parent who love their children and would not want them to live in ignorance of the truth should take the first step to teach their children about sex
I agree with you 100%. Some say that you should talk with your kids as soon as you detect curiosity/interest. I have an 8 year old girl and I wish they were a little more specific. Can someone share at what age they spoke to their kids? How did it go?
Thank you. I updated the post with resources for you. I believe you would find the website helpful https://www.moralrevolution.com/parenting
Thank you, I will definitely read up on this.
It will always be awkward to talk to kids about sex but it Needs to be done. I’d rather my child learn the rights and wrongs about sex from me and her father vs from someone else or even worse someone trying to become sexual with her. There should be no reason a child learns about sex by having it.
I think for this conversation science and religion should come together. Not only give statistics on diseases and precautions but give moral reasons and explanations as to the proper way to go about fornication. Thank you for bringing this up.
Great points sis! Yes, science and faith can be used when discussing sex with our children. Thank you for sharing your views.
No problem! Thank you for bringing this topic to light!
I wish I had been taught this at a young age. I will definitely be teaching it to my children.
Same here sister.
Sighs. Its sad. Freedom can indeed be abused!.
Love your points on these. 💯
And just to buttress, parents should be open to talk about it at depth with the children. In my country, not all parent feel free to talk about it. And one will be amazed at how “sharp” the children of these days are. Overly smart. 😂
Love your new display picture too. ❤
Haaaha. yes. I know the Nigerian culture. Thank you for the compliment.
Smiles. You are welcome. 🤗
Yes and yes!
I believe it is also important that we talk to our children about HOW to wait until marriage. Telling them “don’t do it” isn’t enough, we have to teach them how to manage those strong feelings and desires and help them plan how they will reach their goal of abstinence just like we teach them to reach other goals!
Absolutely! Thank you for the addition.
I agree! The ‘how’ is vital! I often remind myself we should be discipling our children, not just disciplining. The latter is just a piece of the former, right?
Amen and amen and AMEN again! It definitely is something we need to be talking about sooner and more thoroughly than ever! I love how you emphasize that sex is beautiful and designed by God but balance that with the safe parameters He’s placed around it. Great job!
Thank you! In this day and age, sooner than ever is important. We better teach them early or the world will do it for us. If we don’t teach them how to see sex God’s way, the society will teach them how to not see sex God’s way. Thank you for reflecting with me!♥️
I love these! I would add in an awareness for the parent on sexual abuse. Children should learn early about safe touch, and as you said, about the innate beauty and worth of our bodies because God made us in His image. As the mother of an abused child, it is my hearts passion to see God’s people redeem sex as He made it good. Thank you for striving towards that!
I have a post offering 3 ways parents can protect their children from sexual abuse, if you’re interested!
God bless and keep you, sister.
Thank you for the reflective comment. I am thankful for how God is using you to bring healing to many families.
https://sandiebarrios.wordpress.com/2019/08/25/3-ways-to-help-protect-your-children-from-sexual-abuse/